


he likes this better than fighting

by danhoweiis, twoheadlights (fizzfic)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, British Museum, Dan Howell Is A Little Shit, First Dates, Fluff, Humor, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Vampire Dan Howell, an actual tag apparently, basically a carry on au, phan as snowbaz!!!, they r just babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 15:47:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21200144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danhoweiis/pseuds/danhoweiis, https://archiveofourown.org/users/fizzfic/pseuds/twoheadlights
Summary: it's been four days since they defeated the mage and phil wants to go on a date(or: dan and phil as simon snow and baz pitch)





	he likes this better than fighting

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY writing this fic has been so chaotic but it's finally here!!!!! we love snowbaz and we love phan and there's so many similarities between their dynamics so we thought, hey wouldnt it be neat if we wrote them as each other
> 
> anyway, we hope you like this!! kudos and comments much appreciated ofc xxxxx

It had been 4 days since The Mage had died. 4 days that somehow felt like a lifetime. Bryony had decided not to go back to Watford when school started again. Since Phil had lost his magic she had said it wouldn’t be the same without him there. 

Seeing as Phil now had nowhere to live, Bryony’s parents had kindly offered for him to live with them until he decided what he wanted to do with his none magic life. All thoughts of what had happened and what was going to happen had been spinning around Phil’s head for these past 4 days. He’d hardly had any time to see Bryony what with official hearings and interviews he’d had to attend in regards to everything. But it was the weekend, and they finally had a day just to themselves.

“I’m sorry we don’t have any cherry scones, will pancakes do?”

“Only if you have maple syrup.”

Phil had been friends with Bryony for almost 7 years and in all that time he’d had no idea she was such a good cook.

“Bry, these are incredible. You swear you didn’t use your magic on them?”

“I swear.”

They both relaxed into a comfortable silence as they continued eating. It had been nearly 2 weeks since they’d had the chance to just sit and spend time with each other what with everything that had happened.

“Would you like more juice?” Bryony asked when they had finished scraping their plates.

“Why are you being so formal?” Phil chuckled.

Bryony didn’t respond as he walked over to the fridge and pulled out a carton of orange.

“Are you gonna answer me?”

Silence.

Phil rolled his eyes and rested his chin in his hands on the counter. “Just ask me already.”

The reply was almost instant. “Ask you what?”

“I’m not stupid Bryony, I know you’re dying to know.”

She glared at him before rolling eyes. “Fine, I will indulge you. So....you and Dan huh.”

Phil nodded. “Mhmm, pretty crazy right?”

“Have you been snogging him all this time or is this a recent endeavour?”

“No!” Phil said, sounding offended. “I’d never cheat on Agatha.”

“A girl’s gotta ask. So are you guys like…”

“Boyfriends. Yeah.”

“Shit me Phil. You don’t waste any time.” 

Phil felt a blush creep across his cheeks and shrugged.

“So when did this all...come about.”

“About a week ago.”

“And who…”

“I kissed him. I thought he was gonna die.”

“So you thought you’d give him one last snog before he kicked the bucket.”

Phil pouted. “It wasn’t like that! And if you’re gonna be annoying about it I’ll shut up.”

Bryony let out a loud laugh as she walked back over to him. “Fine, fine. I’m sorry.” She said, patting his arm. 

“It’s fine.” Phil said with a shrug. “Just weird now...not having him around or sharing a bedroom with him.”

“Has he not sent you any messages?”

“He is definitely above sending people messages. Wouldn’t want to come off as needy.”

“Then go and see him, maybe then you’ll stop moping around the place.”

“I haven’t been mop-” He started before seeing the smirk spread across Bryony’s face.

“And I would. Go and see him I mean but trains are expensive and I can’t even drive a car.”

“You know, for someone so clever at school you have about an ounce of common sense Philip Lester.”

Phil stared at her blankly.

“Use your wings! You can fly!”

“Why didn’t I think of tha-”

“Because you’re dumb and clearly in love.” Bryony interrupted. “I’ll spell you invisible and then nobody will see you.”

So Phil did. He flew to the Pitch Mansion to see his boyfriend Dan, who was also a vampire, who was in love with him. And he was too. He didn’t think he would get used to that any time soon. 

He rang the bell, and waited. There were footsteps, then a pause, probably someone looking through a peephole. The door swung open, and there he was. 

Dan was beautiful, and Phil would’ve never denied that if asked, but for years his hatred for his roommate really clouded everything else. But now he looked at Dan with his skinny jeans, and his perfect curly hair and his stupid smirk and he felt his tummy flip. “Lester.” He said, quirking up an eyebrow and folding his hands across his chest. “Come on in.”

He let Phil in and led the way to the staircases. Phil couldn’t help looking around, even though he’d seen everything in the castle-like house. 

Phil felt a little stupid, flying all the way over there, because Dan didn’t seem affected by his arrival too much, beyond the initial surprise. His room was clean, cleaner than any room Phil had in his life, but it was so, so  _ Dan _ . His violin was on his bed, like he’d been playing it when Phil got there. 

“What brings you here?” Dan asked, once they both sat on the bed.

“Uh,” Phil said. “I um.”

“Yes, what?”

“Missed you,” he finished sheepishly. 

Dan looked back at him, wide-eyed, like he’d misheard. “Excuse me?” 

“I missed you,” Phil repeated defensively, like he’d been attacked. “What of it?”

Dan bit his lower lip and shook his head. “That’s...you did?” 

Phil shrugged. “Well, yeah. I’m more used to sleeping with you than I am with anything else in the world. It felt weird without you close to me.”

“I see.” Dan pushed himself closer to Phil and put a hand on his knee. “Is this good?” 

Phil rolled his eyes, making Dan grin. “Shut up. You know what I mean.” 

“So you missed being roommates.” 

“Yes. And y’know...the other stuff.” 

He was happy to see Dan look away, clearly embarrassed. He laced their fingers together, and leaned in closer. “I missed you,” Phil said softly. “Did you miss me?” 

“You’re so stupid,” Dan replied. “Yes, of course I did.” 

“Okay, but how  _ much _ did you miss me?”

He was definitely provoking Dan, but even so, he yelped as Dan leaned forward and pushed him down and kissed him right on the mouth. He laughed a little bit against his mouth, but then they got into the swing of it, and Phil loved this so, so much. He loved Dan against him, and the little noises he made in the back of his throat and him mumbling Phil’s name against his lips. 

They came back up for air, and Phil looked up at Dan, slightly panting. “So  _ that _ much, huh?” Phil said, grinning cheekily. 

“It’s me getting revenge for when you kissed me the first time,” Dan informed him, leaning against his headboard. Phil crawled up to him and wrapped his arms around his waist. 

“You were literally going to die!” 

“So you  _ kissed _ me?” 

Phil groaned. “It was like, CPR, you know.” 

“Okay, you would make a terrible doctor. That’s not what CPR is.” 

“Why do you always have to complain about everything?”

“It’s part of my aesthetic.”

There was a silence, Phil’s head resting against Dan’s chest. “I can hear your heartbeat. I thought vampires didn’t have a pulse?”

Dan rolled his eyes. “What books have you been reading? You don’t know anything about vampires.”

Phil mumbled something about how myths came from some form of the truth, making Dan smirk. He decided to change the subject, considering it was also getting late.

“So, were you planning on staying the night or do you need to get back to Bryony?”

“She’s not my mum. A-and I’ll stay, if you want me to.”

Dan sat up and stretched his arms. “Sure, why not.” He replied with a yawn, trying to sound indifferent. 

“I didn’t bring any pyjamas…”

“You can borrow some.”

“Where do you keep the spare pillows and duvet? I’ll go get the-”

“Don’t be stupid Lester, you can share my bed.”

Phil felt his heart flip and tried to hide the smile from his face. “Really?”

“Yes. But if you’re going to start acting like a giddy school girl you’ll be right back on that couch.”

-

Dan and Phil had slept in the same room for years, but this was different. Lying next to Dan, so close that he could touch, Phil felt overwhelmed. He was lying facing Dan, who was propped up and reading a novel. His curls fell on his forehead, and his lower lip jutted out a little when his face rested. He was so fucking  _ cute _ , Phil wanted to cry. 

“You’re staring.” Dan said, not even looking at Phil.

“I - I was  _ admiring _ ,” Phil spluttered. “You should be flattered.”

“Hm, stroke my ego some more, won’t you?”

“I’ll stroke your mum.” 

“My mum’s dead so you’ll have a hard job.”

Phil froze and gulped. “God...yeah sorry. That was a really stupid thing to s-Why are you laughing?”

At that, Dan burst out laughing and clutched his stomach. “You should have seen your face, I’m sorry Phil. Look it’s fine, it’s all chill you know? I’m over it.” He wiped an imaginary tear from his eye. 

Phil didn’t know how to respond to that, he still felt embarrassed, but he was glad he didn’t appear to have said anything wrong in that moment. As a side note, he got to hear Dan’s proper laugh - loud, not at all dignified, with his head thrown back.

There was a silence between them, which was when Phil remembered he’d wanted to ask Dan something. “So when are you taking me out on an actual date?” He asked. One night, he’d dreamt about him and Dan holding hands and walking around some place, he couldn’t remember, but they were definitely on a date. He never could have seen it happen before - Dan and Phil out doing “normal people things” like going to see movies, or to a museum, or out for dinner, but after that dream, he knew he wanted it. All of it. 

Dan looked taken aback by his question, but only for a fraction of a second, before returning to his cool and unbothered expression. “Tomorrow? Where do you wanna go?” 

Phil’s heart sang because Dan didn’t dismiss the idea, or laugh at it, because it seemed mundane. He’d been killing every assumption Phil had had about him for years, each one better than the last. He just shrugged, because really, he hadn’t thought that far ahead. 

“I didn’t think you’d actually say yes so I don’t know.”

“The British Museum in London is fun.”

Phil looked at him, slightly confused. “Is that you saying we should go there or…”

“Yes. Do you want me to spell it out for you? Let’s go on a date to the British Museum, god knows you need some culture.”

“How dare you, I’m from Manchester, the birthplace of the Industrial Revolution, we’ve got mad culture, thank you very much.” 

“You’re very wrong, but you’re lucky you’re cute.” 

“Did you just call me cute?”

Dan sighed and pushed himself down and set his book aside. “Goodnight Phil.”

-

Dan insisted on waking up early so that they could get into London for a reasonable time. They were a 45 minute drive away and Dan didn’t want to risk the traffic.

“Why are we awake so early?” Phil yawned as he rolled over in bed, his wings almost poking Dan in the face. He nuzzled Dan’s neck, wrapping his arms around him and making him squirm. 

“Hands off the neck Lester.” Dan responded, pushing Phil away. “I need a shower.” He said as he sat up and pushed back the covers.

“I forgot how foul you are in the mornings.” Phil said, rolling onto his back as Dan climbed out of bed and stretched. 

Dan grabbed some clothes on his way across the room. “I’m not foul you’re just too cheery.”

Almost 45 minutes later Dan emerged from the bathroom, the familiar smell of cedar and bergamot from the expensive shower gels he uses, drifting into the room.

“Why do you take so long in the bathroom?” Phil asked, his eyes scanning over Dan. His curls had been perfected to within an inch of their life and he was wearing what appeared to be a dark green silk shirt with a grey jacket and grey slacks.

Dan stood in the middle of the room and pointed at his face. “This. This is why I take so long.”

“You’re insufferable. Do you have any clothes I can borrow?”

Dan didn’t say anything and walked over to his drawers, pulling out an old striped t shirt he hadn’t worn in about 2 years. “Next time bring your own clothes.”

“You know I’ll leave them behind.” Phil replied, walking to the bathroom himself. 

“I’ll just keep them for you in a drawer here.” He said it with such ease, like he wasn’t thinking about it, but the weight of that statement wasn’t unnoticed by Phil. 

Phil didn’t take 45 minutes in the bathroom. In fact he was ready in a record 20 minutes. He had decided to slick his hair back into quiff, much to the surprise of Dan.

(“Your forehead is so pale, I’ve never seen you show so much forehead flesh.”)

“Are we actually leaving now?” Phil asked as they made their way out of the front door. 

Dan nodded as he unlocked the car for them before turning to face Phil. **_‘Nothing to see here.’_** He muttered, pointing his wand in Phil’s direction and watching Phil’s wings disappear.

Phil turned his head and watched as they slowly disappeared until they had gone completely. He almost believed himself for a second that he was just an ordinary person.

“Now we’re ready.” Dan said, climbing into the driver's seat.

“Are you not telling your dad that you’re going out?”

Dan shrugged. “He’ll only stop me going and tell me that I should be inside studying.”

Phil frowned. “But...school’s out.”

“You think he would notice?” Dan cleared his throat. “Anyway, have you been to the British Museum before?”

Phil let Dan change the conversation as he told him about some of his favourite exhibits that he wanted to show him, and how the only British thing about it was the fact that most of the artefacts were stolen from colonies years ago. He was excited, Phil could tell, his eyes sparkling, and he looked so good in his green shirt, but Dan had always had that effortless look about him. Phil reached out to hold his hand on the gear shift and caught him smiling but not saying anything about it. 

They reached the museum, which would’ve been overwhelming with its sheer size and pillars, but after going to Watford for so many years, he’d lost the ability to find historical buildings intimidating. 

Dan held Phil’s hand as they entered the museum and immediately led him to the Greek and Roman department. The walls were filled with antiquities (it was a bit like being at Dan’s house.) There were paintings on the walls and chipped pottery that were at least 2000 years old.

Phil walked around, completely in awe, his eyes wide and jaw dropped. Living in orphanages all his childhood he hadn’t really had many opportunities to do things like this and he wanted to soak in every part of it.

“Did you know this guy?” Phil asks, pointing at a rather ugly looking sculpture as they made their way through the African section of the museum. 

Dan stopped and looked at the sculpture, it had to be at least 1000 years old, if not more.

“No, and will you stop asking! I’m the same age as you Phil, I haven’t been around since 310BC.”

The rest of their morning in the museum was spent mostly like that. Phil pointing at something old and asking if Dan knew them and Dan shaking his head and being seconds away from spelling Phil’s mouth closed permanently.

“We should get lunch, I’m starving.”

“You’re always hungry.” Dan said as they made their way out into the July sunshine to find a cafe to eat.

They stumbled upon a small bakery down a side street selling cakes, sandwiches and warm drinks.

“These cakes look amazing let's go here!” Phil said, practically dragging Dan inside with him.

They were seated in a corner on squishy chairs and an elderly lady came over to take their order.

“I bet she thinks you’re such a stereotypical millennial because of how pale your skin is.” Phil joked. Dan glared back at him, not rising to the insult.

Their drinks and food arrived quickly and Phil was so hungry he practically inhaled his sandwich and drank half of his super deluxe hot chocolate in one go.

“You’ve uh...you’ve got whipped cream on your lip.” Dan said, gesturing to his own upper lip.

Phil’s tongue licked out to swipe it away but all it did was spread the cream up to his nose. 

“You idiot,” Dan laughed, leaning forward. Phil thought Dan was going to kiss him, so he closed his eyes, but then he felt something wet brush against his nose. 

“Gross!” Phil recoiled. He rubbed his nose with the back of his sweater aggressively. “Why would you do that?” 

Dan shrugged. “Kissing, biting, licking, it’s all the same, isn’t it?”

“No it’s not! Just because you’re a vampire doesn’t give you the right to bite me whenever you want.” 

“Want to say that a little bit louder Lester? I don’t think Ethel in the back quite heard you.”

“Sorry,” Phil muttered, taking another sip of his hot chocolate.

On the way back home, they talked about their day at the museum and all the things they saw, and when there was a lull in conversation, Phil didn’t feel like it was uncomfortable. They could sit in each other’s company now, and he didn’t have to worry that Dan was secretly plotting to kill him in his sleep and Phil loved that.

The car stopped in front of Dan’s house, but Dan and Phil didn’t move just yet. 

“So, did the date live up to your expectations?” Dan asked.

Phil shrugged, a smile playing on his lips. “It was alright.”

“Just alright?” Dan pouted. 

Phil laughed and pulled Dan closer. “It was  _ great _ .” He said, and kissed Dan softly. 

Dan huffed as he pulled back. “Clearly you need to go to more museums if you think going to the British Museum was just  _ great _ .”

“I’m sorry, did I offend your pals?”

Phil was out of the car before Dan could even lift his hand up to shove him.

“Lester! If you don’t shut up, I’ll spell your mouth shut for the rest of eternity!” 

Phil laughed as he made his way up the drive. “You’re planning on being with me for eternity?”

Dan shrugged noncommittally. “Maybe.”


End file.
